The Rambling Couch Sitter’s Top Five Least Favourite Sports Teams

Here are my Top Five Least Favourite Sports Teams in order. These are teams that have had a large influence on everything I dislike about sport. I can never truly hate any team..... well maybe one or two from this list can be put into the “Hate” category.

 

Port Adelaide Football Club (AFL) – If there is one team I truly hate it is the Port Adelaide Football Club (PAFC), they are represented by the Magpies in the South Australian National Football League (SANFL) and the Power in the Australian Football League (AFL). This is a team that tried to turn its back on the SANFL in 1990 to join the lucrative AFL competition much to the outrage of South Australia. It resulted in the Adelaide Crows being created by the SANFL to counter the push by Port Adelaide. The culture at PAFC is very much “us versus them” and the socio-demographic of the supporters is working class which further fuels this attitude. 

It was this attitude that drove them in 1990 and if they looked at the “big picture” they would have seen that there were some Victorian clubs in real strife which may have lead to a true club competition in the AFL rather than just an expended Victorian Football League calling itself the AFL. They are often referred to as the collective brain cell by yours truly. So much is my hatred to this club whenever I see supporters in the street I will mutter under my breath “Wharfie Scum” and a trip to Alberton Oval is always a pleasant experience.

Melbourne Victory (A-League) - Rank second and are fast tracking themselves towards the “hate” category. Captained by Kevin Muscat this team plays tough football which is good, but it is often too tough. Their team is arrogant and their supporters are at times scary especially when in a group. So bad is the rivalry between the Victory, Sydney FC and Adelaide United that the visiting supporters are given a police escort while walking to the Victory home ground. Whenever the Victory fall behind there is a great tension in the stadium. The players start whining to the referee and the fans will just whine.... Quite simply, they are very sore losers!!

Sri Lanka Cricket Team – It was tough to decide between third and fourth, but Sri Lanka gets the nod purely around the “Murali” chucking furore. Murali was called for throwing during the Boxing Day test in 1996 based on the Laws of Cricket. Usually this meant that the bowler was banished and never came back to the game until they sorted out their action or never came back at all. The problem was that the Sri Lankan captain Arjuna Ranatunga thought that his bowler was victimised and added fuel to the fire saying that the call was racially motivated. 

This incident threatened to split world cricket with the powerful Asian block of countries (India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka) and the West Indies threatening to break away from the ICC. The potential loss of revenue resulted in the ICC reviewing the laws around when a bowler is deemed to be throwing and the bowler is referred to coaches for “corrective action”. Murali went on to take 500-600 more wickets to become the highest test wicket taker of all time. Not bad for someone who should be branded a “chucker” and banished from the game.

Italian Football Team – are fourth due to their performance against Australia at the 2006 World Cup. Fabio Grosso did a nice little dive in the penalty box just before full time to earn Italy a penalty. The penalty was converted and Italy won 1-0. Italy was already down to 10 men after Marco Materazzi was sent off in the 50^th minute and Australia due to their superior fitness probably would have won had the game gone to extra time. The referee decision to award the penalty was considered controversial. There was also an incident earlier in the play that the referee should have awarded a free kick but this was missed and hence no advantage was given. If the goal had been scored from that then well done, but scoring one after the dive is sacrilege. 

The Italians did go on to win the World Cup, so the decision ended up being very crucial. After the game, Grosso maintained he was fouled, saying, "I tried to avoid contact, I got past one defender but then my leg got stuck in between the other defender's legs and I had no option but to go down. My aim was to go all the way." But of course Grosso would say something along those lines.

St Kilda (AFL) – Scrape into the Top 5 more from their off field antics rather than their on-field play. While footballers in general have a reputation for being “lads”, the reaction that St Kilda initially had to a 17 year old girl releasing nude photos of some of their players was overdone and a public relations nightmare. The incident was the result of revenge by the girl over the treatment by some of the players towards her. There were rumours of her being pregnant and losing the baby amongst other things. St Kilda threatened to sue her for a large amount of money that she would be paying off well into her 30’s. The morality of the players was never questioned by the club and tragically the girl’s family have disowned her. It is one of those situations where there is no winner and it was clear that the girl needed help. Recently the club has agreed to provide accommodation for the girl in exchange for the photos being removed from the internet. The right outcome has been achieved but the Saints have lost respect from the incident.

This is not the first time that St Kilda have been involved in such an incident. Players Stephen Milne and Leigh Montagna in 2004 were the at the centre of a police investigation of the rape of a woman. No charges were laid, however in June 2010 a former detective who was the lead detective in the case made claims that the case collapsed under internal pressure from within the Victorian police force and powerful club backers as well as another detective alleging the cost of the case was a factor.

Other teams to miss out on the top 5 were Arsenal, Glasgow Celtic, Croatia and Manchester United

Should Michael Clarke be the next Australian Test Cricket Captain?

Photo: Getty Images

Before I begin this, I want to acknowledge that Michael Clarke is a very good player and I like his technique when he is in form. However Clarke is currently out of form and lacking confidence with the bat. Without speaking to the man himself, one can only ponder the reasons why the form and confidence have dropped so dramatically. Do we put it down to the break up with Lara Bingle, or is it part of the normal form slump that most cricketers can have. Who knows ?

Perhaps we need to look at Clarke’s record pre and post the Lara Bingle break up to see if that could be a factor. The www.news.com.au website has an article dated March 13, 2010 which refers to the couple having not spoken since Tuesday. March 13 was a Saturday, so that makes Tuesday March 9^th. So I’ll take my statistics from there, and I would like to thank the www.cricinfo.com website for providing the data.

	Mat	Inns	NO	Runs	HS	Avg	100	50	4s	6s	Ct
Pre Lara Bingle Split	58	94	12	4116	166	50.20	13	17	441	17	56
Post Lara Bingle Split	11	20	0	626	168	31.30	1	3	81	2	13
Vs NZ in NZ	2	3	0	259	168	86.33	1	1	37	2	3
Post Lara excl NZ Tour	9	17	0	367	80	21.59	0	2	44	0	10

As you can see since the split with Lara Bingle, Clarke’s average has dropped by about 19 runs overall. Now the interesting part comes if you exclude the NZ tour statistics. The reason I have completed this analysis is that the break-up occurred at the time the Australian Team was in New Zealand. This was done to see if the break up had an immediate effect on Clarke’s performance, which given the row “vs NZ in NZ” most people would say that it had a positive effect.

This is clearly an aberration which could just be put down to Clarke reacting to the situation. If you consider the post Lara Bingle split averages and exclude the NZ tour as the row “Post Lara excl NZ tour” shows. The average drops to just 21.59 from 17 innings with 2 fifties and a highest score of 80 in that time. As much as Clarke would hate to admit it, these stats would indicate that this dramatic event in his life has had a fair impact on his batting form.

With these stats most people (including me) would suggest that Michael Clarke should not be in the test side, let alone be the next Test Captain. Personally, I would much rather see him return to the Sheffield Shield to regain form and confidence but most of all spend the time getting his head right. This is not a bad thing and players of Clarke’s calibre will find the missing pieces to the puzzle and work on earning their spot in the Australian side.

As for the Captaincy, given the high profile of the position in Australia, I tend to agree with Darren Berry’s article in the Age recently where he suggested that the Captaincy should be rotated amongst various aspirants to determine if they can perform under pressure. This would provide the best opportunity to pick the right person for this important position. However it must be on the proviso that the person can make the side based on form.

Cheers,